In this episode Jesika
and I talk about
In this new episode, Shannon chats to the energetic, big-hearted, badass soul Jesika Liston about swaggering your way to success. As a coach Jesika has been on her own transformational journey on a personal and business level and has enthusiastically taken her lived experience and created a magnetic audience who adore her and all she stands for. Such a high-vibe conversation.
You can tune into the following topics at the times below;
- 0343 Meet Jesika
- 0654 “Badassiness”
- 0942 Jesika’s mission
- 1154 “I can’t expect to sell designer Gucci at the Walmart”
- 1514 Reclamation
- 1626 “Should” is the number one word that everybody should get rid of
- 2616 Addiction to adrenaline
3728 what role does leadership play in your life and business?
- 4021 how do you know when you’re thriving?
- 4300 What’s that last piece of wisdom?
Meet guest Jesika Liston. Swagger Specialist
How do you describe Jesika Liston? She’s all about making an impact. She’s part intuitive style, part strategy, part sales mentor and an incredible cheerleader for others. She’s 100% here to teach you to swagger your way to success by helping you own your Soul Swagger and discovering how to turning surplus into sexy.
Connect with Jesika here
She Lead She Thrives, the home of inspired conversations, practical and creative wisdom, expansive leadership and business insights, abundant Bragaudacious moments of celebration and useful info you can actually do something with.
You’ll hear about mindset marketing, money, magnetism, self awareness and the Thrive Factor Framework, it’s Archetypes and more. Amplify your role as a leader, a self led soul. Tap into your effortless success zone. Turn your ingeniousness and wisdom into profitable income streams.
From solo shows to guests you’ll definitely want more from, there’s something for every ambitious ingenious soul.
I’m Shannon Dunn, a true OG of the business coaching space, with an obsession with thriving. You are so welcome here. Let’s dive into today’s episode.
Visit ThriveFactorCo.com/links for all the latest news and offers.
A huge hello everybody. I am delighted to welcome you back to another episode of She Leads She Thrives podcast I’m your host, Shannon Dunn and as a business and leadership coach I am so honored, excited, all the energies around there to to welcome my next guest, Jesika Liston.
So I’m going to share a little bit about how I met Jes. And then I’m going to give her the stage to talk a little bit about more about herself. And then we’ve got some really cool questions I want to go through with her today in the episode. So we first connected. I was thinking about this yesterday. Yes, it must have been. It was an early part of last year. And here we are right now in October 2022. I was gonna say 2020? No, let’s forget about 2020. That’s gonna end up I don’t want that year again. Right. It was like it was probably about March of last year. And we were in a program together with a coach that we’ve both worked with for a period of time, like kind of a long period of time.
And I remember back then kind of thinking like, Who is this woman like, you know, there was an energy about you, that was intriguing to me for sure. And I love that you just came in you shared so like there was, you know, there was a truth, there was a vulnerability. And there’s also a frustration in a lot of what you were sharing at that time. You were kind of, but like from the outside looking in, it’s like she’s going through some kind of evolution and change. There’s something going on here. But equally, I was drawn to you and interested to kind of know more about you. And I love that we’ve been able to get to chat previously and to you know, to connect through different ways. And here we are.
I’m in Australia, and you’re not. I’m gonna ask you in a moment to share where you are. And you know, one of the another beautiful things is like the I’m so grateful for the online world because we get to have these incredible connections and build relationships with people everywhere, which is so so cool. And so how do we describe you let me see.
So as I said, like, I feel like you’re coach definitely, like it’s a really key part of everything that you are and what you do and how you work with people in the world. But you’ve kind of got this mix of kind of attitude with a you know, when you write a disruptive kind, there’s no BS about it, but with a big soft heart like I see that as well. And I don’t know that necessarily that will you do, it’s not that you don’t lead with your heart. But I feel like they’re kind of the here I am out there, like with this kind of, you know, presence is much more dominant in you in a lot of what you see visually. And you describe yourself as really focusing on intuitive style and strategy and being a sales mentor. So there’s a lot that we can talk about today. So, welcome, beautiful woman, tell us a little bit more about yourself and where are you in the world?
Jesika Liston 04:33
I’m so excited. And I’m so honored that you asked me to chat with you today. So I’m in Montana, which is in the United States. We’re very northern part of the United States. So I was born and raised here.
Yeah, such a beautiful part of the world. I have been very long time ago. I will get back there again one day for sure.
Jesika Liston 04:55
I can’t wait for you to come so we can help each other.
Yes, that’s it, isn’t it? This is is the thing about when you meet people online and you build relationships with them, there’s this kind of a beautiful expectation and excitement about one day, we could actually meet in person. And we could hug each other and hang out and have like a whole other level of interaction, which is really, really cool. So where do we start? Like, tell us what kind of people you coach and like what you co-create with them?
Jesika Liston 05:23
yeah, this is this is really fun. Because you know, when you first met me, I was still working in the corporate world. So I’ve actually been a business strategist for over 17 years. Yeah. And I did that in the corporate world. And so what I did there as I grew more business coaches, and I did that for so long. And I felt that my calling was so much higher that when you first met me, March of last year, I was in the process of transitioning out of corporate and into my own business, which is really exciting. And man, there’s been such an evolution since then.
Jesika Liston 06:03
I know that I’m good at business strategy. But I also knew that there were more pieces to that particular puzzle. And it’s taken me a bit of time to really understand where do I fit in, in the world? What is my calling, and even though I like to be sort of this non-niche niche, in that we can talk about business, but let’s also talk about your soul. And how do we heal past trauma, and bring in all of your desires, so that you can run your business in a way that feels fun and feels effortless. And that is a true reflection of that soft heartfelt center. And so that’s why you see me leading with heart.
Jesika Liston 06:54
But I also like you said, I have this badassiness, this totally fun, loving, edgy exterior, because that is also my way of shocking people out of their almost like the haze or the veil that they have over their life. Because I want people to wake up, and know that there are more options available to them, you don’t have to just be one thing, you don’t have to just stay one person, you get to evolve and you get to grow into this magical creature that you’re meant to become. And your journey gets to be both messy and beautiful. And you get to try on different outfits. So that’s why I’ve kind of branded myself as a soul stylist, as an energy healer, as a business strategist. I’m sort of all the things.
Well, this is it. And I think this is one of the true gifts of being able to, you know, step into that space of entrepreneurship or, you know, owning our own businesses is that we can bring all of those identities together. Whereas in a corporate or in our employees space, there’s more rigidity, there’s compliance things, this is how we do it. Don’t bring your personality. And this is what you need to do. You know, and that didn’t suit me. I’m not surprised. I didn’t suit you.
Rebel sisters as I love it.
Yeah, it’s like no. And the more I see someone, anyone in the world, coming to a place where they’re like, you know what, I want to do things different, the more I celebrate, because I see that they’re waking up as you said, that was such a beautiful term to use to the fact that there could be so much more if they want that. Like no, no disrespect or anything against anyone who is who seemingly is happy. Of course, there are people who say they’re really happy, bigger employee kind of doing the same thing over and over. But I do actually really really know that that there are some people that could be okay doing that, it was never going to suit me, never not gonna suit you.
Jesika Liston 09:04
yeah. And I totally agree. And that’s, that’s the whole point is I want everybody to get to that point in life, where they say, Wow, I have a really fulfilled life. And that is going to naturally look different for everybody else. And I associate that kind of like your outfit. I mean, if you wear blue jeans, and a crop top and a flannel sweater and you feel sexy and confident and powerful wearing that, then wear it right. You feel sexy and powerful and confident in your yoga pants and your oversized sweatshirt, then girl rock that too.
Yeah. So I love that you talk to them just very briefly around, you know, what we put on the outside of our bodies, because I know that, you know, personal aesthetics and you know, what we wear and how we show up with that kind of visual style is something that it’s been really a big part of your evolution and what you’re working with your clients about. So tell us about why personal aesthetics actually matter? Like, why is that a thing we need to be mindful of as business owners? Yeah, I think that is a say, and rebels
Jesika Liston 09:42
So really, that’s really my my heart and my mission is just basically help every soul whether it’s man or woman, take up the space that they were destined to take up. We don’t have to try to fit into the mold of somebody else’s dream for us or an ideology that we have to do this thing? Because it’s what the generations before us did.
Jesika Liston 10:40
And rebels. Yes. So, subconsciously, you are putting out a vibration. And there are so many people, potential clients, and audience members who are watching you who are going to feel your vibration, and the reason why your aesthetics matter so much. And when I say aesthetics, I’m not just talking about the physical outfit that you wear, but how you do your hair, how you do your makeup, the language that you use, the imagery that you use. This is your branding, your social media,
Your outside expression, isn’t it? All parts of that?
Jesika Liston 11:18
Yeah, it’s everything. It’s literally everything. And the reason why that’s so important is you’ve obviously heard the phrase, first impressions matter. But the let’s go a layer deeper than that. The reason that matters so much is because this is really showing your true character in how you’re going to take care of your business and how you’re going to take care of your money, how you’re going to take care of your clients. And so if your language is vanilla and lacklustre, then why am I going to follow you? You’re just like everybody else. Yes.
Jesika Liston 11:54
And if your imagery is boring, then how are you really going to help me feel inspired? If your money is all over the place, then that is also a reflection of really your inner soul and your inner confidence. And what people don’t realize sometimes is there’s a fine line between showing up as your true self and having standout styling, and I believe that you should have both. We don’t need to show up as a hot mess Express for people to know that we’re a real human. We’re already a real human like that should be obvious. But at the same time, you should really pay attention to the type of person that you’re talking to so that you can attract your ideal client. I can’t expect to sell designer Gucci at the Walmart and I don’t know if you have Walmart in Australia.
I’d suggest that most people in Australia or those listening will know what Walmart is because we see it on TV. And we have our own equivalents. Kmart is probably our one.
Jesika Liston 13:08
Perfect. Right. And so this is an example of if you want the higher clientele then you need to speak and dress and present yourself as that because you are the embodiment of what you help your clients with. Now that’s no shade on Walmart or Kmart.
Space for someone at every level right?
Jesika Liston 13:38
Yes. And so your your personal aesthetics and your branding and the way that you speak is sending a vibration and we want to make sure that whatever frequency you’re on is moving your ideal client to action. If it’s not moving them to action, we got to turn up the dial we got to turn up the frequency sister.
So if someone’s listening in , and they’re like, I am listening I get this but I kind of feel like I’m not really been able to to embody the expression of who I may be who I want to be on the inside and if I think about some of the women that I’ve worked with as clients over the years, sometimes there’s been more of an external voice that’s come in or kind of the the world voice that said you can’t dress like that or you can’t say that or you can’t do you know where your hair like that or you can’t wear that shade of lipstick or whatever. Like there’s something someone or something’s come in and said to them, tone yourself down.
Not from being kind of loud and overly expressive, but just tone yourself down from what they want to do. Yeah, so there’s kind of this soul on the inside is crying for just let me just be a bit more expressive and colorful or you know, whatever it is like, what how do you support someone who’s in that space where the external like voice in the world has been so loud that even though they’ve got this internal desire, it’s still not been able to be expressed because there might be fears, judgments, criticisms coming from self and others.
Jesika Liston 15:14
Yeah, this is actually my favorite part of the topic. Reclamation. I grew up in a very Christian conservative household, and you know, tattoos were frowned upon and the way that you dress like, you don’t want to bring too much attention to yourself. But God really created me to be loud and expressive and to be the trailblazer. And so I’m definitely going to be the one that is going to go first.
Jesika Liston 15:42
It is uncomfortable to be the one that sets the stage. And it’s uncomfortable to be the one that sets the trend for others to follow. But here’s what I really believe you are chosen to be on this planet for a reason. And if you are not quite sure what your style is, it’s because you don’t know who you are without the titles. So I carry a lot of titles. I’m a healer, I’m a mom, I’m a military wife, I’m a daughter, I’m a Christian, I’m a sister, I’m a all these different things, right. And when you strip away the titles, even the name Jesika was given to me by my parents. And so when you strip away, Jesika , like who am I, I truly believe that this is your character at the end of the day.
Jesika Liston 16:26
But every time you shove it down or put it back in the closet to go with our clothing pun, right? You are saying I don’t want to be who I was created to be, I’m supposed to fit into this cookie cutter. So essentially, I help people break out of the cookie cutter mold and really figure out who am I without all these titles and expectations? What do I love? And what is the space that I want to take up in the world? And then how do I have the swagger to actually take up that space.
Jesika Liston 16:26
And so if I’m that really loyal friend that is going to sit with you in the dark times, and I’m going to celebrate with you in the joyous times. That’s who I am when you strip away my name and my title. And so how do I then express that? Well, I believe that there are certain words that you should get rid of immediately. And that is “should”. “Should” is the number one word that everybody should get rid of.
Jesika Liston 16:52
Because if you think I really want to wear this outfit, we’ll just talk about clothes, because that’s what we love to talk about. If I really should wear this outfit, because I’m a millionaire. So millionaires should dress like this. Okay, that means that you’ve already been programmed into a stigma of what millionaires should dress like, or moms should dress like or 50 year olds to dress like this.
Jesika Liston 17:19
So we got to get rid of the programming and the society expectations around the word “should”. And then we’re going to get really connected to why do you actually want to wear the thing that you want to wear, like, let’s say it’s jogging pants and a crop top. There, there’s different codes in your body and your soul and in your mind, that are moving you in that direction, maybe you want to feel comfortable, maybe you want to feel seen, maybe you want all eyes on me, maybe you want. Maybe you don’t want all eyes on you. And you know, you want to just go with the flow, there’s a lot of really specific coding and it matters. And your body, your mind and your soul are nudging you in that direction.
I love it. Love it, love it so much. One of the ways that I have really, really celebrated I think is the word that’s coming to me, using the Thrive Factor Archetypes is not as labels, but as ways to tap us into our own innate psychology. So, you know, I think probably one of the easiest examples when we’re talking about that external view of the world.
Sure, yes, our expression is to think of the Queen Ruler archetype. You know, she is here to lead on a large scale if she chooses. She has an incredibly philanthropic individual, she loves to give back to community, but she also loves luxury, she does like the high end vibe. And when you have a woman that has that archetype within her makeup, and she also has other archetypes that may be in kind of conflict with that there can be a real identity challenge into how do I express myself visually in the world, because I want to have the designer label thing, but then the Mediator Diploamt Archetype, but I also have a saying to me, Well, you can’t spend money on that. That’s not just a very practical, no nonsense archetype. You that’s a bit silly to be spending that much money on that thing.
How are people going to think you are so a lot of the time being able to use a woman’s archetypes has been such an incredible way for her to understand more about who she is, without, as you said, those labels of society that we have, we all have so many of them. And I think that the word “should” imagine the world if we just remove that word, and no one ever knew it existed, right?
Jesika Liston 20:20
They’d be so vibrant.
And I think when I think about the times when should comes up, that’s actually my sign. It’s not like a red flag, it’s almost like a, just a colorful, vibrant flag. This is something to pay attention to, you know.
Jesika Liston 20:37
Mine is kind of like a blinking light. It’s like being being Hello, pay attention to me. And it’s like, oh, I need to sit up a little straighter. And let me dive into that a little bit deeper.
Yeah. What is this really an invitation to, you know, when she comes out what else is this giving me an opportunity to think about, and it’s not always I don’t think go the opposite way to what the should is, but it’s like, you don’t have to follow the should sitting there in the way.
Jesika Liston 21:03
Yeah, and this is really what I mean by this awakening. Is let’s just get more clear on why we do things. And if you’ve done something, since you were a child, or because your mother did it, it’s as you mentioned, it’s an invitation to just take a look at, is that really true to you? Does that really feel good? Or is that programming that has just become habitual, and now you’re comfortable doing it, because you’ve done it for so many years?
Jesika Liston 21:30
Once I started to really break away the layers of that, and understand, I get to be my own person, because that’s who I was called into the world to be. You get to decide what part of your childhood programming or what part of your social programming or even what part of your – Well, any type of programming really, yeah, in which ones you get to disregard? And it’s all keeping your future in mind, where do you want to go? What do you want to be? What do you want to create? And being able to then put in the puzzle pieces that you desire most.
Yeah, I love that. I think the other thing that’s coming to my mind that would be important to talk about is that you don’t just have to also have one expression in the world. The woman who’s out there in a designer dress one day and in sweats the next day. And they are both you, they’re both authentic expressions of who you are, right?
Jesika Liston 22:38
Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. And this is what I mean to buy the non niche niche, like one day, people will see me rocking my mom style, because I am, I’m a mom, and I’m proud of that. And then sometimes I will be more of this, like edgy biker type of oh, man, there’s like, there’s so much going on with that archetype. She’s kind of like my biker badass, and I’ve taken pictures of my Viking hairstyle that I do.
Jesika Liston 23:08
And then then I’ll have like this sweet, soft, gentle side of me that’s on a date with my husband. And it’s because all of those versions of me, it’s still me at the end of the day. And I don’t have to pinhole myself in this domain of, well, I am just this and this is the only way you can see me because that’s where the humanity gets taken out of social media.
Right, so much. And I think that while I have I obviously really need to share what I’m about to share. Right? Now, kind of stuff, are you going to clear that throat to make sure that you know that chakra is ready. But that social media, I have so much gratitude for it? Because for example, no, we probably wouldn’t have met without 100% social media. But at the same time, I feel a level of frustration and kind of challenge with this visual imagery that it’s kind of the expectation that setting – not just for youngsters – for anyone.
I’ve seen, clients I’ve worked with into their 60s and 70s really overwhelmed about but how do I need to look when I’m online? How do I need to look when I take a selfie? How do I take a selfie, but through to the younger ones who were just like on their phones or doing their kind of social expression in various different ways all the time. And I I kind of am intrigued to see where this ends up going over time.
But also, you know, I really want to be a part of the conversation that says you don’t need to look a certain way or have all your makeup on or be wearing a certain color that aligns with your brand if you’re in business, to take a selfie or to share you yourself in the world like just go with who you are on the day.
Jesika Liston 25:01
Easier said than done right? Because we want to impress people. And I certainly have worked my way through this wanting to lead an impressive life. So that I felt valid as a coach, because if you saw the growth that was happening in me, you might not hire me because you knew I was growing. And oh, man, it was chaotic there for a while.
And it’s exhausting. Like, who wants to keep like, working through all that nonsense.
Jesika Liston 25:30
So exhausting. And here’s what I have learned is that it’s really learning how to tap into your feminine. There I had such an overproduction of masculine that I was like, I need to be this person and do this thing and prove this and, and go, go go and doo doo doo all the time that my feminine was almost non-existent at the beginning of my journey, because I didn’t know how to receive, I wasn’t comfortable receiving, I didn’t know how to trust. I was angry that I didn’t understand trust, and trust faith and receiving were the three things I feel like I’ve worked on the most in the last two years. And that’s really into my feminine side.
I’ve seen you just more recently, just talking about how you have what’s it I’m trying to think of the other words that you’ve used, but it’s it’s almost like broken up with your addiction to adrenaline, like how you’ve been working on that. And I when I was reading it, I was like, Oh, that’s so interesting. And again, like you haven’t come out of corporate when I went into my business and I think about the constructs of that kind of veneer, a working environment. Often more masculine often more driven, often more action action action, doo doo doo, doo more, achieve more, which I’ve certainly unlearned.
You know, that was, again, my natural state because it was reinforced so much in my world, and then coming to the place of what does it really mean? You know, where do I find my space where I can have those both sides of me the masculine and the feminine? Working in harmony together? Yeah, supporting me to to be who I am in the moment, which is different every moment. So tell us a little bit more about that the adrenaline thing, because I think a lot of women will really resonate with that, and what you have been doing to support yourself to shift into that space of more harmony?
Jesika Liston 27:28
Yes. So I realized that I had an addiction to adrenalin, because my happiness, and my emotional intelligence was significantly attached to the results that I would achieve. And so I was only happy if I was constantly dieting, I was only happy if I was constantly making money, if I was proving myself through the results. And so if I didn’t have the results, I would dramatically fall into a depression. A woe is me, a very dark state. And I have this situational happiness.
Jesika Liston 28:12
That’s what our situational happiness Yeah. And so what I noticed is I was on this roller coaster of super high highs and super low lows, to where life was good, life was good. If it was bad, it was really bad. And I started to get signs of this through my physical body because I would almost have these, well, it literally was an addiction. And if anybody has ever struggled with feeling the effects of addiction, or if they know what it’s actually like to feel high, that it’s that’s what my results felt like to me.
Jesika Liston 28:50
Okay, so then, the depths of the depression, I ended up in the hospital at one point because I literally thought I was having a heart attack. Because the pressure, it was just too much. And so that’s really, that was the first sign of me needing to reevaluate my life. And through my coach and my mentor right now, Tasha Wall, she’s really helped me identify what in my life was causing me the adrenalin and because I didn’t even know where it was coming from.
Jesika Liston 29:21
And isn’t that the way as you said before with the conditioning, and then we just kind of keep going along, and it just keeps happening when we lose the ability that we have lost the connection to the source.
Jesika Liston 29:35
Yes, exactly. Exactly. It and this is what I also call micro aggressions. So people will go through big trauma, big, huge, scary trauma. I never had big huge scary trauma. But I had micro aggressions, and what I mean by this is little subtle comments said to me that formed a belief in my mind that then caused me to need to validate myself.
Jesika Liston 30:08
So comments would come to me from my mom, from my dad, from friends in my social circle. Even as I was watching mentors, it’s like, oh, I “should” be like this or be like this, or do that and do this. And if I’m supposed to be successful, maybe that means I should go here and do this. And, and so it was almost like I was pressuring myself into fitting into this specific category. And so essentially, I have gotten rid of the word shine. And I have learned to receive because of who I am, and the experience that I have, not because of any type of condition, or what I do for people, I’ve learned to trust because I want people to trust me.
Jesika Liston 31:02
So at the end of the day, the more I open my heart to people, and situations and experiences and learning and love, the more I open my heart instead of protecting myself. If I open up, this is really where I can say, I can trust and I don’t need the result because I’m already proud of myself. This has taken a very long time for me to learn. And I’ll be honest, I’m still mastering it at every level.
Of course, that’s the reality that with every new experience, we don’t want to label good, bad, whatever, but every new experience, every learning, every unlearning every kind of expansion, every contraction, there is another like mini evolution that’s going on, or is all kind of meshing together to be a bigger evolution of us. I feel like stepping into who we actually were born to be. It’s not who we desire to be necessarily, it’s who we were born to be. And so it’s not a kind of linear thing where we just do the steps and we tick it off and go, okay I’m done with that now.
Jesika Liston 32:08
It’s exactly not a coat that you just take off the hanger. And I’m gonna wear this, it doesn’t work like that. And I have to actually share this breakthrough with you if I could, I just had this epiphany probably three days ago, that my feminine is actually a dark feminine.
Jesika Liston 32:30
And what I mean by that is her energy is dark, and my masculine energy is light. I always have this belief that my feminine energy is supposed to be light and pink and frilly and fluffy and lace and girly, girly, girly. I couldn’t understand why I was repulsed by her. Oh my gosh, it’s because that’s not me. I’m not her. I like depth, and sensuality. And my ideal feminine is walking in the dark, listening to the owls, hoot and looking up at the stars, and sharing a glass of wine with my husband, under a blanket by a fireplace. And it’s in the quietness of the night time that I’m the most connected to my feminine.
Jesika Liston 33:25
And so for everybody that’s listening, I’m just going to challenge you to consider for a moment that maybe your masculinity, your man, your production side, your creative side is light and fun and airy, and loud and energetic and just sort of crazy and wild. And maybe your feminine likes the quietness of the dark, and the coziness, and the warmth of your husband and and maybe she even likes the rain, and thunderstorms and lightning and mystery and that’s okay. And if you just learn to embrace it, instead of putting this style on who your feminine is supposed to be or your masculine is supposed to be, I think you’re really going to start to truly uncover who you are.
I love that. There’s, I think I’ve said that 1000 times conversation. I love that because I do and what you know, just for anyone listening, I think I’ve mentioned that I do have the Inspirer Believer Archetype within my Thrive Factor profile. Jesika hasn’t been profiled just yet, but 100% she would have that archetype. There’s no question about that at all. It’s the cheerleader archetype she’s here but at the same time as the archetype we’re currency her currency is energy. And she’s either often very high like kind of engaged in out there in the world filled with belief, or she can be in the cave of the despair and what is going on and I’m gonna burn all this down.
At the same time, like that is where my I love this, I’m excited. That’s where my energy comes from my Inspirer Believer , just for anyone who’s listening to clarify that one for sure. Yes, identity is such an interesting thing. And then we’re, again, we have so many external messages coming from the world about things like feminine and masculine, you know, are they supposed to look like, what are they supposed to feel like, that’s another version of “should”-ing, you know, there’s more “shoulds” going on there. And it’s you said, when you can get to the place where you can gift yourself perhaps the time and the space to understand what your versions are, that’s when everything can change for the better.
Jesika Liston 35:36
you know, if you’re cool with who you are, okay, but I just, I think it’s something you’re missing out on, if you don’t explore that.
Jesika Liston 35:43
Agree, 100% agree. And once you can unlock that, and I know you can help with that, I can help with that. But really unlocking that, and then being able to embody him her, whatever side of your energy you’re going to play with that day, that’s when you’re going to notice your business is going to change, your happiness is going to change, and your money is just going to skyrocket.
Jesika Liston 36:07
And I think style and identity, those words can sort of be interchanged. And because that’s the essence of what we’re talking about is your truest purest identity, accepting it, loving it, letting it shine, letting the world soak it all up. And then also being able to grow and evolve and change your mind if you want to.
Completely, completely the, you know, the counselor, the therapist in me has worked a lot with identity over the years and with clients who have been in true identity crisis. And it’s that flux of chaos of not knowing who they are, or feeling like they can’t be who they desire to be, which we’ve already kind of talked about. So you know, we need more of us out there doing this work, guiding others and holding a space where they can explore that for themselves with support, so they can actually come to go, this is who I am today. And as you said, change your mind tomorrow if you want. That doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you. Yeah, we can go into this so much.
Jesika Liston 37:04
We could talk about this for days.
With my last podcast, I did sometimes have guests come back again. And particularly when they’ve kind of evolved themselves. I love to come back and go okay, this time, like last time we talked about like, but now I see you’re, you know, you’ve come to so, let’s see where this where this space goes. Next chapter might be, you know, months or a year later.
But right now, I’m going to ask every one of the guests that we have on the show some of the same questions to get your kind of use of it all, like She Lerads She Thrives is certainly about thriving, you know, and everything about my world or thrive factor, but also about leadership and self leadership. And that’s a big part of what underpins the creation of the trifecta was, you know, personal or self leadership principles. So, the first question I have for you is what role does leadership play in your life and business?
Jesika Liston 37:55
Oh, my gosh, yeah. Literally, the epicenter. So the way that I define leadership is through movement. Are you going to move? And I truly believe that you need to move yourself in a curious direction. And I’m the type of leader where I don’t proclaim to know everything. I don’t want to know everything, because how boring would that be. But instead, I want to be curious about life with you. And I’m going to move with you, I don’t always want to be 5, 10, 100 steps in front of you. I have found the most brilliant partnerships, shoulder to shoulder, truly locking arms with my clients and moving forward in life with them. So I believe that’s really leadership.
Jesika Liston 38:58
And then even when you are the trailblazer, you continue to move not because you have to set the example because that feels heavy. But because you’re curious, and you love to explore and learn and try things and mess up and make mistakes and do it different and try it on and try this on and, and really get to know yourself and let others get to know you and you get to know them. And that’s that’s how I really see leadership.
It’s such a great answer to reflect on and to get curious about like, I think the word curious is one of my favorite words. And certainly it’s a part of my personality. It’s like, let’s just see what’s over there. Let’s kind of look at well, why did I feel or think that or do that? That’s interesting. Let’s be curious about that. So yeah, I completely get what you’re saying then.
And I found that when you mentioned then around leadership being kind of more shoulder to shoulder and kind of walking with people. That to me is a true expression of coaching in its rarest kind of beautiful form. Not the coaching as we both know you, and I’ve been in the coaching space for a long time. It’s not a lot of the advice giving that we’re seeing out there, you know, it’s not the, you know, be in my space, and you’ll become like me, or I’m out here, you need to work towards me. That’s not how I see coaching.
I see the coaching, being around co-creating and collaborative relationship with our clients. You know, how do we, as you said, walk side by side, and do the thing together? You know, learn together, explore together, get curious together, you know, cry together? If that’s what happens, a laugh together, celebrate together, be in the dark together all the things? Yeah, but do it in that beautiful shoulder to shoulder. Next question I have for you, how do you know when you’re thriving?
Jesika Liston 40:55
Because I don’t say words like “should”, Or “can’t”. Or “I’m supposed to”!
Jesika Liston 41:03
Those are no longer in your vocabulary. They don’t exist in your world.
Jesika Liston 41:08
Yes. Yes. And you know, this is for me personally, the way that I know that I’m thriving is would I do this or say this or talk about this regardless if anybody would listen to me or not? Okay. One of the things I asked myself is, if I already had the millions, if I already had all the clients, if I already had the most amazing dream supple body ever, if I had everything I had ever wished for, would I still talk about this? Would I still act like this? Would I think about this? Would I put this content out there? And if the answer is yes, then that’s how I know that I’m thriving. I’m not thriving if I’m worried about what other people think, or if I’m trying to achieve a goal.
What an interesting way to look at it. Yeah. So so good. All right. I have one kind of final question. I’m going to ask you in a moment. But before we do that, how can people connect with you, if there’s everywhere anyone’s been listening in, they’re like, I want to know more about this woman. And trust me, as I’ve said to you all, I have, you know, been connected with Jesika online for probably more than 18 months now. And have loved watching your evolution and being connected to you and seeing your growth. You know, from the other side of the world until we can hug one day in person.
Jesika Liston 42:40
The feeling is mutual right.
A beautiful thing to witness. So if anyone is curious, and like, I want to know more about her, I want to follow her I want to learn from him, Where is the best places for them to connect with you?
Jesika Liston 42:52
So of course, social media. So Facebook and Instagram. Now my name is spelled a little bit more unique than most Jessica’s. It’s je s i k a. Liston. You can also go to my email address, which is successwithJes@gmail.com.
Yeah, awesome. So we will make sure as we will do for all of our guests that their contact details are easy for you to find in our show notes. So in addition to the contact details and highlights, and you know, we can find them on social media. The other also thing that we are doing in all of our show notes is putting a full transcript of the show. So if you’ve listened to us say something and you’re like, I just want to know exactly what that was and go back to that then go into the show notes, which will always be primarily published on my website, which is thrivefactorco.com. Look for Jesika’s episode when it’s live, and you’ll be able to find that and as I say often too, if you can’t find any of the guests reach out to me or reach out to to Team Thrive Factor. And we will make sure that we can connect you with them. But I think it’s pretty easy to find people these days online, don’t ever hold back looking for them all. So that final question before I wrap up for today What’s a kind of a piece of wisdom that you’d like to share as a wrap up for what we’ve been talking about, which has gone in all sorts of beautiful directions? What’s that last piece of wisdom? Oh, this is always the like,
What do I do? Where do I go? I’ve got 10 things I want to keep saying which one!?
Jesika Liston 44:22
Oh, right. Okay, so um the last piece of wisdom that I would say is the key to life is love. So the more you can love yourself, the more you can love people, the more you can fall in love with experiences and exploration and learning, the more rich your life is going to be. So fill it up with love.
Yeah, Beautiful I’ve no doubt that the ambitious ingenious souls listening will get that. And if you if you’re not kind of sure what that is then just again lean into it. Yeah, curious we talked about that get curious but thank you so much for being here my beautiful friend it’s been so awesome to connect and have such a rich conversation as I had no doubt that we would.
And thank you listeners for tuning in and listening to my conversation with Jesika today. I look forward to sharing our next episodes with you and please as always, and make sure you subscribe, you rate the show, you share it with your friends. Some more people can hear these incredible rich global conversations we’re having on She Leads She Thrives podcast, Have a beautiful day wherever you are in the world. Keep thriving.
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